Friday, November 29, 2013

Changes to My Diet in 2014

In 2013 I gave up red meat; I haven't eaten beef since December 2012. I'm not going back. I will continue not to eat beef in 2014 (and probably forever). In addition, I've decided to also make these changes:

-No carbonation
-No HFCS (high fructose corn syrup)

No carbonation is obvious - no soda pop. But I didn't realize how many products besides drinks have HFCS. Here are the foods I like that need substitution:

Stove Top Stuffing - Turkey
Thomas English Muffins
Most Kellogg's cereals
Most Lifesavers candy
Kellogg's Pop-tart's
Nabisco Ritz Crackers
Nabisco Wheat Thins
Cool Whip
Yoplait Yogurt
Nabisco Oreo Pie Crust
Any Oscar Meyer Lunchables that contain bread, breading, or cornmeal

I didn't mention a lot of products that have HFCS. The most important thing will be to check the labeled ingredients before deciding to buy.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

What's On My Mind?

Today, my mind is filled with poetry - thoughts said in few words. Here's what I'm thinking:

My Work
The mason chisels stone 
The sculptor works with clay
I chisel and sculpt my words
Until I find what to say

I mold and scrape and work 
My words until they are just right
My unfinished work spurs me on
Even until late at night

The Definition of an Artist
When thinking of the word “artist”
Singing, and painting come to mind.
But an artist is someone who creates,
And art is undefined.

“I’m not creative” some might say
As they submit a spreadsheet sublime.
“I beg to differ” as they make
Their work to last a long, long time.

Fine art is held by photographers,
Dancers, sculptors and the like.
But don’t count yourself out of artistry,
Just because you can’t chisel with a spike.

All
The word “all” connects 
The widow’s mite with 
The first and great command.

It also connects service
To love
And to giving with an open hand.

“Hold back nothing
And receive everything”
Is the counsel we are told

I open my heart
And give all that I have
Because I want the blessings of old

Monday, November 25, 2013

It's Never Too Late

The song "Desperado" says this, "you'd better let somebody love you before it's too late". That song runs through my head this morning as does this thought, it's never too late. At one time I thought, I'm too old - too deep into it - to change. That's not true - the truth is that I needed to have a willing heart and to trust that God would do the rest. I did - I chose and trusted, and He did - He changed me.

God is good. He is my loving Heavenly Father and He wants to help me. It felt hard to trust (because I didn't want to be tricked) but I considered His perfection and that He wouldn't fool me. I kept in mind that He knew best and that He had my best interest in mind, so I trusted Him. He put things in my path that made my life better (music albums, people, books, thoughts) and eventually He changed my life.

I didn't used to refer to God so much. I guess I refer to Him because I want to acknowledge the truth. The truth is that He cares. Even when facing something hard I see that perhaps I face it to receive strength, or to be taught. I love how He does that for me. It may be too late according to someone, but it's never too late according to God.

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Let Girls Be Girls

I just watched a video saying that girls need more toys to inspire them to use their brains. It implied that from an early age girls are given toys that steer them away from engineering, mathematics, and science as only 1 in 10 girls go into those fields.

I believe this a feminist video that says, "Equality!" Girls don't need special toys to encourage them to use their brains. They can use their brains just as well with Barbies, My Little Ponies, and girl toys. There's nothing wrong with girl toys and pink. The video kind of said, "If you're a girl and not an engineer, mathematician, or scientist then you're stupid and don't use your brain."

Not all girls want to do those things, but almost all girls want to be girls. Why should girls do those things unless they want to do them? That video made me mad! Women's rights is now at the little girl level. Girls are not boys, they have gender and roles, and according to this video that's a bad thing.

Perhaps the video's maker doesn't intend to disrespect other girls; they probably just want to promote their toys to girls - and that's fine. But I think they can go about their promotion in a way that doesn't throw other girls under the bus. I'm not an engineer, a scientist, nor a mathematician but I have an analytical mind and certainly use my brain. 

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Living in the Past is Fantasy

Returning home was not the same once I left; I wasn't the same person. (I'm talking about when I was 18.) I had my own life. I stopped being my mother's child to be myself. When I got married I also became my husband's wife. When I had children I became their mom.

I will always be my mom and dad's child, but I've grown up and have my own life now. I faced a dilemma the last time my mom came to visit me. I reverted to being my mom's daughter (the past) because I didn't have the courage to be myself (the present). After my mom left, my family felt confused because I didn't act like me. When they told me how they felt I faced a crossroad: Would I revert to the past? (and confuse my family) or be the current me? (and let the past be in the past). I chose the second one - to be the current me, a grown woman, a wife, and a mother.

Same with childhood friends. As a young girl, I had a best friend. She will be my friend forever, but after we grew up we got different lives. What we had was special, and I'll always remember it, but my current life is special, too. It's fun to rehash old times with her, but honestly old times are just that - old times, memories, not today.

It's not my job to make people see me as I currently am. They are responsible for themselves. All I can do is be who I am today and live my life in the present moment. 

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Where's the Mercy?

Our router stopped working on Monday, which meant that everything that used the internet didn't work; in our case that meant all the computers (including my iPad), and the TV. Per called ATandT and told them what had happened. The person he spoke with said they'd send someone out on Tuesday. He told them that he worked from home and that he needed their help that day (Monday) because he couldn't do his work. He told them that we paid a lot of money every month to have the internet and expected it to work or, if it didn't, to be fixed right away. The phone technician said they'd tell him a temporary fix and asked him to turn on the router. Per said that he was an electrical engineer so he wasn't a novice. He said that there was something wrong with the router and he wasn't going to turn it on and have a potential fire hazard in his house. 

During their conversation, Per discovered that the ATandT power adapter was bad when he swapped it with another one and the router started working. He told them what he had done, and asked them if they could send a technician over to simply drop off another power adapter. He said that he needed it on Monday because early on Tuesday morning he was going on a business trip and wouldn't be home to accept their package. ATandT said a technician would be over on Monday in a couple of hours, but no one from ATandT ever came. This morning (Tuesday) FedEx delivered a box containing a new power adapter. Per is gone.

No matter how big a company is, they can help if they choose to. Their action of sending a box to be delivered on Tuesday said, "Do it my way. Fall in line and accept the way I do things." They weren't thinking about us, they thought about them and expected us to accept their method. 

I have thought about this situation, and no matter how selfish someone else is, I can choose to be merciful and forgiving. Even when dealing with a company, I choose how I am. My first inclination may be to get angry and say hurtful words, but what does that say about me? It say's that I have meanness in my character. Unfair things happen all the time, and how I react to them says something about me. I want to be loving. That means to be loving even when someone else isn't. I forgive ATandT and don't think badly about them, even if they didn't help us yesterday. I don't say this for people to be mad at ATandT but for them to look in their hearts and honestly consider how they are regarding mercy and forgiveness.

Monday, November 11, 2013

Trusting Me With Money

Per is the perfect partner for me. He is kind and loving, and goes out of his way to help me and make me comfortable. He is also strong where I'm weak and helps me to learn a better way. One of my biggest weaknesses is handling money. I tend to spend when he saves. Usually, I think that saving is boring and that spending is fun. But now I see that saving has these advantages: 1) You have money, you haven't spent it all, and you can buy the things that you really want. 2) Saving helps you to live within your means. You're realistic and don't pretend that you have more money than is a reality. It's good to be realistic about how much money you have so that you don't overspend.

It's one thing to buy things for right now, but if those things are only for me does it really matter? What matters is spending money on things that invest in building relationships; relationships that last into the next life. Being able to show something bought is relative - it depends on whether showing it right now or later. Spending money on something to be shown "later" is not a waste...it's just shown later. 

Per has been the voice of reason that has said "no" to me many times during our married life when I wanted to spend money. I appreciate that he said "no" so that at the right time he could say "yes". Also, I appreciate that he gives me control over our money (even though I'm bad at it and have wasted it several times). I've learned so many things about money that I couldn't have learned if I didn't have access to our funds. I've learned because I truly want to be better. I strive to improve. If I didn't care to improve I don't think I'd have access to our money because he wouldn't trust me. Thank you, Per, for your patience and for trusting me with our money.

Wednesday, November 06, 2013

Being a Saturday's Warrior

I grew up being called a "Saturday's Warrior". A Saturday's Warrior meant someone born in the last days who would "fight" against evil and (hopefully) be alive at the Savior's second coming. A musical called "Saturday's Warrior" was made and to this day I can sing all of the songs. (The musical was written as a college project and the writers never intended for it to become as popular as it became.)

I'm 45 now and my youth has come and gone. Was I a Saturday's Warrior? Yes. How? Well, the Savior hasn't come yet. I'm a "warrior" because I stand up against evil. It really doesn't matter who's alive when the Savior comes again. The real thing that matters is getting eternal life. I'm still a Saturday's Warrior because I choose the right. I have taught my children to choose the right, I hope they will teach their children to do the same thing, and on and on and on.

One thing I can share with my kids is how I remember a truly peaceful time. Back when the play was written, the writers thought times were bad - they didn't know that times would get worse. (They must have thought that times were pretty bad because they hoped for the second coming. The musical was first performed in 1973 - that's 40 years ago! If they thought things were bad then, imagine how bad they are today.)

No matter how bad things are, I always have the choice as to how to be myself. Having a morally bad world is kind of a blessing because something really bad makes it easy to choose the good. I will forever and always be a Saturday's Warrior even if I'm not alive at the second coming.

Saturday's Warrior (a song written in the 70's for the musical)
Who are these children coming down, coming down.
Like gentle rain though darken skies.
With glory trailing from their feet as they go.
And endless promise in their eyes!

Who are these young ones growing tall, growing tall.
Like silver trees against the storm.
Who will not bend with the wind or the change,
But stand to fight the world alone!

These are the few, the warriors
Saved for Saturday, to come
The last day of the world
These are they, on Saturday.

These are the strong, the warriors
Rising in their might to win
The battle raging in
The hearts of men, on Saturday.

Strangers from a realm of light
Who have forgotten all.
The memory of their former life.
The purpose of their call.

And so they must learn why they're here
And who they really are.
They must learn why they're here
And who they are!

These are the few, the warriors
Saved for Saturday, to come
The last day of the world
These are they, on Saturday.

Tuesday, November 05, 2013

Reassuring People

I felt inspired to say this on Sunday, February 3, 2013:

"A good leader inspires their people...from their people's perspective. They don't expect their people to think like them - because their people get stressed and think I can never be like that - but they say things that cause their people to consider possibilities."

The possibilities statement is an example of giving people true freedom. The opposite of freedom is control. Control says, "I'm in charge" and "Do what I say". Freedom says, "You're in charge" and "Do what you think is best". Freedom encourages and allows the other person to choose. Control offers no encouragement and only says, "Do what I say because only I know best." 

Control doesn't trust anyone but themselves. Freedom and trust go hand in hand because freedom trusts that the person will make a good choice. Whatever the choice is, freedom has hope that a good choice will be made. Freedom also has belief that ability is had to make a good choice.

Parents maintain control over their children. They tell them what to do when they're young because their children truly don't know what's best. I can see how power struggles exist between parents and teenage children when at some point they both think they know what's best. I think when a power struggle shows itself, it's the perfect time for parents to step back and let their children take the lead, and for parents to let their action (stepping back) say, "I believe in you and know you can do it."

Good parents don't get offended when their children want to take the lead but realize that their children are doing exactly what their parents raised them to do - make decisions (not scared to make decisions because only their parents can do that and do it right.) 

Good parents give control to their children and are there to lift them through encouraging words when they fall. Parents can greatly influence and inspire their children when they give the reins to their children and essentially say, "Here, you drive".

Everyone wants the freedom of being in charge of their own life. No one wants to be controlled, on the contrary everyone wants the reassurance that they can do it. When freedom is given, it is out of love. When a person is given freedom that love is given back through appreciation.