It Used to Frustrate Me But Now It Doesn't

As I look back at my journal entries from the past week I see that I learned a lot about myself. Experiences that felt hard told me how I am. I'm reading a book ("Not My Will, But Thine") by one of my favorite people, Neal A. Maxwell, and he said that experiencing trials is a part of life that tell us how we are. He quoted Hebrews 5:8 that says, "Though he were a son, yet learned he obedience by the things he suffered." Even Jesus learned from his trials.

I've learned that my trials refine me and make me closer to my "real" self. I understand and feel the same way as Paul when he said, "Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities ... for when I am weak, then am I strong." (2 Corinthians 12:9) When my trial frustrated me I couldn't say, "I take pleasure in this", on the contrary I said, "I don't like this!" and "This sucks!" But because time has gone by and because I've accepted my fate I'm willing to see my trial in a different way and can see things that benefit me. My heart feels at peace now and I see the world around me not just my trial. I feel lucky that I had an intense five year learning experience. Even though my trial goes on I consider the good side of it ... that it teaches me.