Teach

Parents can really help their child by teaching them things they don't know, instead of assuming they know; because they don't.

The best thing a mom can do is teach her son to communicate. Boys don't naturally know how to communicate their feelings; they aren't "talkers" like girls. Girls relate, talk, and share their feelings, but boys don't; boys may learn to do those things, but they aren't natural, innate qualities. Boys grow up to be men who hold their feelings in and aren't comfortable talking about how they feel, unless they have been taught taught (usually by their moms) how to express themselves with words.

Girls watch their moms and learn how to be women. Boys watch their dads and learn how to be men. A boy and girl marry, and if the boy hasn't learned to communicate, the girl thinks she talks to a wall. The girl tries to get the boy to talk and he thinks she's a nag. The girl gets fed-up that her man won't communicate with her so she says "buh-bye." The boy wonders what happened? and what went wrong? If the girl doesn't say "buh-bye", she feels sad because she wishes he would communicate with her. (She really wishes he'd communicate and share his feelings without blaming her.) That scenario can be avoided (or at least lessened) if a boy learns to communicate.

If a parent won't talk a certain way to their daughter, they need to not talk that way to their son. Boys have feelings too, they just don't talk about them. Boys need to be treated, by their parents, as lovingly and girls. 

I see many effeminate boys these days; and less boys who are gentlemen, knights in shining armor and chivalrous. To me, boys who cry about unfairness are acting like girls. I think to myself boys don't cry, they suck it up and are brave. Life isn't fair, so why do we lie to our children and not prepare them for the future? Some people think I had to learn it and so should they. I think I'll tell my kids whatever I know. Of course kids will learn things they don't know - because they're smart, but why would I want my child to learn something I know when I could just tell them? What if they never learn it?

I can see some parents saying, "According to this post, I didn't do the best for my child because I didn't do those things and now my kid is grown." To those parents I say, "Don't be so hard on yourselves, you did the best you could with what you knew. The past is in the past and can't be changed; let it go and don't beat your self up, instead say "would shoulda coulda" and realize you would have done things differently if you'd known. Give your child the advice about boys when they ask for your help; they'll think you're wise :)."