Loving People

It's easy to love people who are nice but not so easy to love people who are mean. People's imperfections hurt when they affect me. Whatever people do gives me the opportunity to be how I want to be... loving. Having the knowledge that people might hurt me gives me the freedom to choose to be loving, kind, and merciful; all the things I want God to be toward me. Loving someone stops me from judging them. I think judging is the thing people do most. Jesus told us to do one thing and one thing only...to love people; he said that by doing this we showed our love to Him. I will add another attribute to the things I want in my character; namely mercy. I want to be loving, patient, kind, and merciful. (Really, I could just say loving because it encompasses the other three attributes, but specifically, I'll say that I want to have the other three attributes too.)

I used to have more judgmental thinking, and thought people needed to be a certain way. I am not that way today, and believe that people can be who they are. Recently, I told my son that I wanted my mom to come here. He mentioned that it sounded hypocritical because the things I had said about her for the past two years didn't match that I wanted her to visit me. I see his point. I had spoken badly of my mom and had felt mad about injustices in my youth. (Now, I look at those experiences and realize they are in the past.) Every kid experiences wrongs, because no parent is perfect. I had always thought of my childhood as happy, but when I wrote my book in 2011 it caused me to consider my childhood again. I looked at my childhood with adult eyes and saw a different perspective.

I held a grudge against my mom because I wouldn't have done some of the things she did; I judged her. Not only did I not like her, but I told other people (Per, Bryan and Andrew) about my childhood injustices and they didn't like her. I caused my family to judge her based on what I said. Today, in 2013, I want to let go of the grudge I've had in my heart for two years. I called my mom, we talked, and I told her how I felt. We resolved all the bad feelings we had. I love my mom, she's a good person; she parented the best way she knew. (Forgiveness has allowed me to see good things about her.) She's not perfect and neither am I. I will try my best not to judge her, so I can love her instead.

The scenario about my mom seems to relate to the story in the Book of Mormon about the Anti-Nephi-Lehi's; that they laid down their weapons of war for peace. If I relate the story of the Anti-Nephi-Lehi's to myself, I say, "I laid down my anger toward my mom to love her instead." Jesus said, "Inasmuch as ye do it unto the least of these[,] my brethren, ye do it unto me." (Matt 25:40) I added the comma after the word "these" because I consider myself one of Jesus' brethren when I show mercy to someone. I want to show Jesus that I love him, and the way I do that is by loving people.